My Life With Comic Books: Part # 183

A brief introduction:

My name is Paul Howley. Some people have called me the "luckiest man in the comic book business" but that all changed as of January 9th 2001, when our son, Adam Howley, died.

The current cast of characters:
Paul Howley: age 46
Mal Howley: age 46
Adam Howley: my son, age 21
Cassy Howley: my daughter, age 17

MY LIFE WITH COMIC BOOKS: THE HISTORY OF A COMIC SHOP-Part 183

The winter of 2001 was now gone and the ground was no longer frozen. It was time to bury our son, Adam. We had picked out a burial lot on a small hill in Union Cemetery. It was an awful feeling, knowing that this would mark the last place that Adam’s earthly body would occupy.

The day of the burial started at our home, with our friend, Meridith, practicing a song written by Dar Williams that she would sing at the cemetery with Cassandra. It was a meaningful song that pointed out that we are all “family” in many ways. Here are the lyrics:

Can you fix this? It's a broken heart.
It was fine, but it just fell apart.
It was mine, but now I give it to you,
Cause you can fix it, you know what to do.

Let your love cover me,
Like a pair of angel wings,
You are my family,
You are my family.

We stood outside in the summer rain,
Different people with a common pain.
A simple box in that hard red clay,
Where we left him to always remain.

Let your love cover me,
Like a pair of angel wings,
You are my family,
You are my family.

The child who played with the moon and stars,
Waves a snatch of hay in a common barn,
In the lonely house of Adam's fall
Lies a child, it's just a child that's all, crying

Let your love cover me,
Like a pair of angel wings,
You are my family,
You are my family.


My brother-in-law Greg picked us up at our house and drove Mal, Cassandra and I to the funeral home so that we could see the casket. Five months before, at the memorial service, we handed out permanent markers and had encouraged friends and family members to write their “good-byes” to Adam on the casket. This was our private time to get to read what was written by the people who knew and loved Adam. After we were done, Greg drove us to the cemetery and I noticed that Laconia Monument Company had delivered the headstone to the gravesite.

When we arrived I was glad to see that the funeral home had put up a large tent over the open grave because it was pouring rain. The funeral director gave out black umbrellas to the hundred or so friends and relatives who came to the service. It reminded me of the burial scenes that were frequently in movies…dark, somber skies with a heavy downpour of rain and a “sea” of black umbrellas. I remember thinking that Adam would have appreciated the image.

After I got out of the car, Cassandra broke down in tears, sobbing for the first time in our presence since her brother’s death.

My memory isn’t very clear about the burial service anymore, but I do remember Cassy and Meridith singing at the front of the group of people. I also remember giving out over a hundred orange roses to the attendees. Then, our friend, Eric Robinson, conveyed an important message to everyone after someone handed out small white cards with the word “Why” on it. He explained that we shouldn’t ask why Adam died. The more important question is “what will we do now that Adam has died?” Will we be angry? Or depressed? Or will we learn to love people more while they are here with us? Eric asked everyone to drop the white cards into the open grave as a symbol of our decision to not ask why.

After the service we invited everyone to the home of my sister Sharon and my brother-in-law Greg. There were well over a hundred people there and while they ate food and shared more memories of Adam, I passed out copies of a videotape I had made that included clips from Adam’s short life. I included bits that had significant meaning to Mal and I…segments from birthday celebrations, holiday gatherings and from his many performances in plays. It had taken me several weeks to put these together and some of the relatives and friends appreciated the opportunity to learn more about Adam through the tapes.

By the time everyone had gone home, the realization had set-in that this was, most likely, the last gathering that would be about our son Adam.

My Life With Comic Books: Part # 182

A brief introduction:

My name is Paul Howley. Some people have called me the "luckiest man in the comic book business" but that all changed as of January 9th 2001, when our son, Adam Howley, died.

The current cast of characters:
Paul Howley: age 46
Mal Howley: age 46
Adam Howley: my son, age 21
Cassy Howley: my daughter, age 17

MY LIFE WITH COMIC BOOKS: THE HISTORY OF A COMIC SHOP-Part 182


I met my daughter Cassandra at her voice lesson one day during her junior year of high school. Her voice teacher, Dona Lynn Curry, was an experienced singer who travelled around the world in various singing groups for several years. For some reason, she felt the urge to move from south Florida to the “Lakes Region” area of New Hampshire and she began teaching voice lessons. My daughter learned quite a lot from Dona Lynn including vocal control and vocal performance techniques. Dona Lynn had put together a group of singers from several area churches and she called it “One Voice.” This group put on a fun Christmas program each year at a local school auditorium.

Dona Lynn asked me if I’d be willing to donate some money to the One Voice group so that they could purchase some costumes for the next Christmas program. I was happy to help her out with this. Shortly, she would help me.

As the snow began to melt and the ground thawed in New Hampshire, we realized we needed to make some decisions for Adam’s upcoming burial. We talked with the management at several local cemeteries to find out which place seemed best for us. We settled on Union Cemetery, the one that allowed plantings by the gravesite. Mal and I picked out a cemetery plot and ordered a black marble headstone from Laconia Memorial to be engraved with Adam’s “information.” We decided to have the happy and sad “theatre masks” engraved on the stone so that future generations could know how much Adam loved theatre. The engraver wanted thirty days to complete the headstone but I really wanted the headstone to be at the gravesite in time for the June 2nd burial ceremony so he agreed to get this done for us.

We asked our friend, Eric Robinson, if he’d be willing to speak at the burial and he accepted the task. We knew he’d communicate a meaningful message to anyone who would come.

As the school year came to an end we were surprised and honored that the senior class of Laconia Christian School dedicated their yearbook to us! It read:

“Dedication to Paul and Mal Howley:
Since they came to this area two and a half years ago, the Howleys have proved themselves true friends of Laconia Christian School.
Their constant help with fundraising activities, attendance at nearly every sporting event, help with the drama productions, Mr. Howley’s leadership on the school board, and countless other instances of behind-the-scenes aid have improved this school immeasurably.

Therefore, in memory of their son Adam, a good friend and brother who went to the Lord on January 9, 2001, the senior class would like to dedicate this yearbook to Mr. and Mrs. Paul and Mal Howley.”

As the date of the burial got closer, as we expected, it saddened us even more because we knew this would be the final “chapter” of Adam’s earthly life.

My Life With Comic Books: Part # 181

A brief introduction:

My name is Paul Howley. Some people have called me the "luckiest man in the comic book business" but that all changed as of January 9th 2001, when our son, Adam Howley, died.

The current cast of characters:
Paul Howley: age 46
Mal Howley: age 46
Adam Howley: my son, age 21
Cassy Howley: my daughter, age 17

MY LIFE WITH COMIC BOOKS: THE HISTORY OF A COMIC SHOP-Part 181

Shortly after Adam’s fatal car accident we decided to buy a safer car for Cassandra to drive. It was time to replace our old Dodge Caravan anyway, so Mal and I went to shop for new car for Cassandra. We went to the local Toyota-Ford dealership and picked out a 2001 Ford Escape. It was a cute-looking, small SUV that we thought Cassy would enjoy driving. We called Cassy and asked her to meet us at the Irwin Zone dealership on her way home from school. By the time we had arrived there, Cassy had already decided that she didn’t like the Ford Escape at all. She had been talking with the salesman and he had just gone to bring up a new Toyota Highlander SUV. When it pulled up, Cassy loved it. It was much larger than the Ford Escape and it had lots of nice features. The only problem was that it was priced nearly $10,000 more than the Ford.

While Cassy enthusiastically urged us to buy the Toyota Highlander, I negotiated with the salesman, Noah. I had recently bought a new Toyota Camry from Noah and he was willing reduce the price but we were pretty far apart price-wise. Noah explained that this was the first year for the Highlander and these cars were in high demand with very few available. After a short time, it became clear that we were not able to put this deal together. When I made my final offer of $27,500 Noah checked with the sales manager and they declined my offer. I told Noah to consider my offer if anything changed because I’d really like to buy the car. Cassy was very disappointed, but she realized the car was far more expensive than the Ford Escape so we’d have to keep looking for a new car.

A few days later, during breakfast, Cassy and I were talking about the Highlander. She said, “Dad, you should reconsider your offer for the Toyota. You didn’t make the offer based on anything other than a made-up price. Can’t you call them back and make a deal?” I realized she was probably right so I agreed to call the dealership later that day. Cassy went off to school hoping that she’d get this new car.

About an hour later, Noah called me to see if I was still interested in buying the Highlander at the price I had offered. He explained that another dealership had requested that his dealership trade the car to them because they had someone interested in it. Rather than lose the sale to me, they decided to accept my offer. I went down that same day and bought the car. I was lucky. My patience paid off and now we’d feel more comfortable with Cassy driving this safer car.

A few days later, Mal remembered Adam’s “prediction” that we would buy Cassy a new car.



Within a year, the Ford Escape had over a dozen factory recalls. The Toyota Highlander was recognized by Consumer Reports as the “best” mid-sized SUV.

Next chapter: One Voice.

My Life With Comic Books: Part # 180

A brief introduction:

My name is Paul Howley. Some people have called me the "luckiest man in the comic book business" but that all changed as of January 9th 2001, when our son, Adam Howley, died.

The current cast of characters:

Paul Howley: age 46
Mal Howley: age 46
Adam Howley: my son, age 21
Cassy Howley: my daughter, age 16


MY LIFE WITH COMIC BOOKS: THE HISTORY OF A COMIC SHOP-Part 180

After our trip to tour Cassy’s future college was over we needed to get back to dealing with the day-to-day stuff of life. Mal had stopped teaching card-making at Liz Verhoeks’ “Stamping Memories” and she spent more time with her friends who loved her and supported her during this time. I was still involved at Laconia Christian School-- busy with the upcoming drama presentation of “Fiddler on the Roof” and school board related stuff. Thankfully, my two comic book and collectible stores were being run by a very good group of people because I was not functioning at my best. I didn’t need to worry about the stores right now with everything else I was trying to deal with.

Living in our home in Gilford, New Hampshire was strange now that Adam was gone. There were too many memories here, so Mal continued to look for a cottage or house to buy in the area. She found a house in Alton Bay, New Hampshire. This was a run-down cottage located inside the Alton Bay Christian Conference Center. This was a 150-year-old collection of cottages that began as a tented Christian retreat center. Over the years the tents were replaced by primitive structures and eventually they became more permanent seasonal cottages. Very few of these were still in good condition but they were very affordable. One of the drawbacks was that the land was owned by the conference center organization and they leased the land to the home owners. Also, all home owners were required to abide by their strict rules and regulations.

The cottage Mal found had a great location with a nice view of the bay. It was conveniently located near the restaurant, meeting center and chapel. The owner, a 90 year-old man, was asking $69,000 for his cottage. Mal offered him $65,000 and the offer was eventually accepted. At the time, we were told that this was the highest price any of these cottages had sold for! Most of the cottages sold from $15,000 to $30,000.

As it turned out, the process for buying this cottage was more difficult than it should have been. The cottage was no longer actually owned by the old man. It had been turned over to his five children who were now living in several different parts of the United States. We needed all of their signatures on all of the documents to transfer their ownership to us. This took almost two months. We also needed to be interviewed by the Board of Directors of the Conference Center to determine if we would be allowed to live on this property. The cottage sale was contingent upon this approval.

While we waited for the upcoming meeting of the Board to determine if we’d be allowed to move forward with the purchase of the cottage, I continued working to sell the tickets for the school’s performances of “Fiddler on the Roof.” By the time of the show, we had sold out of tickets. We sold more tickets for this show than for any of the other shows the school had performed.

Brenda, the director, dedicated the show to our son, Adam, and allowed us to publicize the newly formed “Adam Dean Howley Memorial Performing Arts Scholarship Fund.” Mal and I used our own money to start this fund and we accepted donations from anyone who wanted to contribute to it. My good friend, Kevin Burns, sent a very generous check and that encouraged me to make this scholarship program an important project for us for the next few years. Many friends and relatives also gave generously.

On April 20th and 21st of 2001, the students of Laconia Christian School put on entertaining and emotional performances of “Fiddler on the Roof.” This play featured Ian Jameson as “Tevye,” Natalie Robinson as “Golde,” Nicole Behan as “Tzeitel,” Sarah Hormell as “Hodel,” Cassy Howley as “Chava,” Kimmy Simpson as “Shprintze,” Sarah Hatfield as “Bielke,” Susie Simpson as “Yente, the Matchmaker,” Paul Johnson as “Motel the Tailor,” and many more. Over 60 students acted in this play along with a couple of dozen students and parents getting involved in the backstage and set building. It was another successful event for the school.

Next chapter: The school year ends.

Pictures: Fiddler On The Roof

My Life With Comic Books: Part #179

A brief introduction:

My name is Paul Howley. Some people have called me the "luckiest man in the comic book business" but that all changed as of January 9th 2001, when our son, Adam Howley, died.

The current cast of characters:

Paul Howley: age 46
Mal Howley: age 46
Adam Howley: my son, age 21
Cassy Howley: my daughter, age 16


MY LIFE WITH COMIC BOOKS: THE HISTORY OF A COMIC SHOP-Part 179

Our daughter, Cassandra, was seriously interested in attending Palm Beach Atlantic University of West Palm Beach, Florida, when she finished high school so we had previously made an appointment to visit the college during her February school break in 2001. Even though she was only a junior in high school, we encouraged her to plan ahead so that her college decision could be completely evaluated without any deadline pressure. Taking a trip wasn’t something that Mal and I wanted to do so soon after Adam’s death but we’d try to make the best of it. My parents spent the winters on the west coast of Florida and we had arranged to meet them, along with my sister Sharon and her youngest son Jake, at Disney World, after we toured the college.

We had decided to drive the 1500 miles each way so that we wouldn’t be stuck with an airline schedule, just in case the trip went badly and we needed to get back home sooner than we had originally planned. We left New Hampshire and by the time we got to Connecticut we got hit with a huge snow and ice storm. The traffic was moving at about 10 miles per hour because the roads were so icy. Our Toyota Camry was pretty good in the snow but mid-way through Connecticut our windshield wiper motor stopped working. We eventually found a Toyota dealership that was able to replace the motor which was still covered by the warranty. Unfortunately, this took most of the day. The weather forecast predicted snow for several hundred more miles along the east coast. Our appointment at the college was two days away and Mal, Cassy and I were frustrated enough to consider cancelling this trip. After some discussion, and with some reluctance, we decided to persevere. We stayed overnight at a hotel in southern Connecticut, hoping the snowstorm would stop. It didn’t. The next morning we continued our long, slow trip.

We eventually arrived at Mal’s sister Ginny’s home near Orlando, Florida. We visited with Ginny and her husband Denis that evening then left very early the next morning to drive the long, boring ride across the state to West Palm Beach.

By the time we reached our hotel, we checked in, showered, changed clothes, and headed to the college for Cassy’s scheduled tour of the campus. As we neared the college, we asked a student for directions to the administration office. The young man introduced himself to us (Mike Dee, soon to be the world-famous singer in the band “Tenth Avenue North”) was very helpful, and as Cassy pointed out, “very cute.”

The campus was comprised of mostly new buildings painted a pinkish-coral-color (very south Florida-style!) and the grounds were filled with beautiful, expertly trimmed exotic plants and palm trees. The temperature, for mid-February, was a nice high-70’s. As we explored the campus, Cassy remarked, “This place is like Disney World!” She was sure this was where she’d go for college. She knew her grades were sufficient to qualify for admission (she had a straight-A average in high school) but to get accepted into the musical theatre program she’d need to return to the college next year to audition. She’d worry about that the following year. Right now her decision was made. Cassy would be moving to Florida when she finished her high school.

After the college tour was over we headed back to Mal’s sister’s home. The next morning we met my parents, my sister, and her son Jake, in Disney World. I don’t remember much from the time we spent there. One memory is still quite vivid though. We watched the performance of the musical “The Hunchback of Notre Dame” and Mal and I were both struck by how much the lead female actor reminded us of Adam’s girlfriend, Meridith. Mal and I held hands and cried together. Almost everything we saw during that trip to Disney World reminded us of Adam. This was no longer the “happiest place on Earth” for us.

My Life With Comic Books: Part #178

A brief introduction:

My name is Paul Howley. Some people have called me the "luckiest man in the comic book business" but that all changed as of January 9th 2001, when our son, Adam Howley, died.

The current cast of characters:

Paul Howley: age 46
Mal Howley: age 46
Adam Howley: my son, age 21
Cassy Howley: my daughter, age 16


MY LIFE WITH COMIC BOOKS: THE HISTORY OF A COMIC SHOP-Part 178

After our meeting with Adam’s friends in the park in Newport, Rhode Island, we were all invited to go to Alletta Cooper’s parent’s home for lunch. Alletta’s parents owned a beautiful home in the heart of Newport and they were especially kind to us all. Privately, they told us how much they enjoyed Adam.

It was a good time for us to listen to Adam’s friends tell stories about how he affected them and changed their lives. It was clear that these young people really loved Adam.

Alletta presented us with a large photo album filled with pictures of Adam and his Rhode Island friends. Some of his friends wrote:

“I will never forget the first time I met Adam. He was different from everyone and that’s what this town needed.”

“Adam was always the light in the darkness and he was a beautiful person. I’m glad I had the opportunity to know him. I’ll always miss the beautiful poet that he was.”

“Adam was the most beautiful person I knew. We love him very much and will always remember him.”

“Thank you for bringing such a beautiful person into the world.”

“Adam, every time I close my eyes I can see your face. So I close my eyes a lot.”

“Adam, you were a blessing to everybody…exactly what we needed.”

“Adam, you made a lasting impression on me and you are someone I’ll never forget.”

“Adam touched so many of us in such a short time and it is hard to believe he is gone. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for raising such a great man.”

We were very grateful that Alletta took the time to put this together for us.

Next chapter: Life without Adam must go on.

My Life With Comic Books: Part #177

A brief introduction:

My name is Paul Howley. Some people have called me the "luckiest man in the comic book business" but that all changed as of January 9th 2001, when our son, Adam Howley, died.

The current cast of characters:

Paul Howley: age 46
Mal Howley: age 46
Adam Howley: my son, age 21
Cassy Howley: my daughter, age 16


MY LIFE WITH COMIC BOOKS: THE HISTORY OF A COMIC SHOP-Part 177

“Ob-la-di, ob-la-da, Life Goes On.” Part Three.

On that freezing-cold day in February of 2001, thirty-nine friends from our church in Laconia, New Hampshire joined us as we anxiously waited for Adam’s friends to arrive in the park of Newport, Rhode Island. As the “Park Rats” arrived, we encouraged them to sit on the tarps we had set up on the frozen ground and they huddled together to try to keep warm. Eventually, about sixty young people who knew our son Adam came to hear what we all wanted to share with them.

Mal began by assuring the kids that Adam had really loved them. She explained that Adam understood the importance of love because of the love that God had for him--perfect love with no conditions, a free, undeserved gift from the creator. Mal explained the concept of the beaded bracelets that our church had made for Adam’s friends and she gave them out to all of the kids.

We invited some of Adam’s Rhode Island friends to come up and share about Adam. A few of the kids shared some poetry they had written about Adam. I read a poem Adam had written during his stay in Newport.

Some of the teenagers from our church performed a short play called “The Doors Drama.” In this short, nearly wordless play, a young woman moves from door to door, seeking fulfillment in her life. She tries drugs but finds that path to be an empty promise of happiness. She tries materialism but that is also unsatisfying. After several more options, she opens the door that the Creator of the Universe offers and finds purpose and fulfillment. “Ask and it will given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened for you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.” (Matthew 7:7)
“So be earnest and repent. Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.” (Revelation 3:20)

Our friend, Eric Robinson, stood and shared a message with the kids. He explained that he understood their reluctance to conform to what “society” wants them to be like and related their feelings and ideas to his own teen-years as a rebellious non-conformist. Eric let them know that the void they felt in their lives could not be filled with drugs, sex, or money. But God, the Creator of all, can fill our lives with direction and purpose. Eric urged the kids to consider this, not because they thought Adam would want them to, but because they truly wanted to explore a deeper relationship with God. He asked anyone interested to come up front so that we could pray with them and talk to them about the spiritual possibilities that this could open up for them. Out of approximately 60 kids, 41 of them came up front to hear more.

We had contacted a local church to ask if they would be willing to be at this meeting to offer support to any of the kids who wanted more information. They did come and they recorded the names and contact information of the kids who expressed interest.

Because of Adam’s death, a seed was now planted in the hearts and minds of dozens of kids.

Pictures: Adam in a car in Newport, Rhode Island (one of my favorite pictures…he looks very happy here!)
Adam with some of his Rhode Island friends.
Adam with his friend, Aleeta.